I Will Not Be Continuing My Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020
Dear Queeroes,
I am writing today to let you know that I will not be producing and hosting my party POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020, and I want to tell you why I made this decision. IML has been a wonderful space for me as a kinky person, and also as a book author and artist. I first had an author table at IML at the Marriott in 2013 thanks to the wonderful support of the Leather Archives and Museum. Year by year, I came back to IML with new volumes of my series to sell and autograph. In 2014, I kicked off POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML and MAL as a grassroots event to build community. At the time, I wanted to bring together gay, queer, trans and gender-non-conforming male identified folks to celebrate their passion for remixing classic leather, kink, and superhero fetish. And guess what? The party grew, and grew. As of last year, the party draws about 200 attendees in fantastic kinky cosplays that make it the world’s largest superhero fetish event, by my estimate.
Starting in 2016, The Superhero Fetish Meetup was added to the IML lineup and official schedule, which blew my mind, and also help extend the reach of the event. As you can see by photos on my Instagram, you can see how each year the party grew in attendance and fun.
Fall 2019 has just begun, and I have decided to not continue POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup. It’s of course not easy to make this decision, but it comes from very positive reasons.
Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020
My brand of kinky and queer superhero books is expanding, and I never expected to have such a popular book series that delights gay and queer men. In fact, I am releasing a fifth How to Kill a Superhero book in 2020. As an author, I am grateful my readers have come this far in the journey.
As my book series has gained more reach around the world, the scope of the community building that’s part of the superhero and spandex fetish community has also inspired me to go into new directions with the events I curate. Nowadays, my book readers and community members include more trans, queer and non-binary folks, women and people of color than ever before, and it’s thanks to their feedback that I am moving into new virtual and physical spaces that celebrate who they are. That means that I will be organizing new events and meetups in the near future that align with the needs of my readers and fans. This includes more international events in Mexico, the UK, the European Union and Asia, as well as an expansion of my online communities, such as the one in my Discord community (which you can join when you subscribe to my free newsletter). It also will include more inclusive and safer spaces that align to the needs of my community.
I want to stress that the IML organizers have always been professional, generous, organized, and great friends. I am in awe of how much they accomplish year by year, and their legacy can never be forgotten. I will always enjoy visiting IML as a spectator and supporter of its efforts in the LGBTQ community and worldwide kink populations. I send out a huge blast of gratitude and joy to them as I move into a new chapter of this story.
This Month In Spandex: July Edition
This is a preview of the new photo set Tonatiuh, God of the Sun, coming later this month to my Patreon. Credit: Cesar Torres, all rights reserved.
The month of July contains many surprises for my amazing readers, fans and Patreon subscribers! This is what you can expect to drop:
Stickers are Shipping
New subscribers who joined my Patreon or upgraded tiers in June will get their exclusive 4”x4” laptop sticker. Stickers begin to ship this week.
New Photo Sets Drop This Month
For my first photo shoot this month, I am doing a new and intense bondage shoot! But there’s a twist! This time, Patreon subscribers get to choose what superhero or villain gets tied or does the tying. All subscribers will be encouraged to post their suggestions of what the cosplay and bondage shoot should be! And the subscribers in the Mega Photo tier will be the judges of all the suggestions. That photo set will drop July 26 at my Patreon, and it will be available to all the tiers. The Mega Photo tiers and above will get 2-3 bonus shots, as well.
Check out the brand new teaser I posted above! I will be releasing a new photo set called Tonatiuh, God of the Sun. In this set, I will guide you into my world of Aztec mythology and introduce you to the sun god Tonatiuh as I mash him up with the gay superhero Apollo from DC Comics! This new photo set extends the ideas that I developed in the How to Kill a Superhero books. I think you will love them. This photo set drops July 31 on my Patreon.
My Short Film
I’ll be posting excerpts from the script of the short film I am working on! Look for that to drop on July 12
New YouTube Episodes
This month on my YouTube I’ll be focusing on livestreams. This gives me some space and time to focus on the writing of my film script, but it lets me stay in touch with you and all the queeroes. Here are the times and dates for streams this month:
July 9 at 5 PM Central. Topic: The DC gay superhero Apollo and the making of the Tonatiuh Photo Set
July 16, at 5 PM Central: Fan Q&A
July 23 at 5 pm Central Topic TBD
July 30 at 5 pm Central Topic TBD
4 Essential Tips To Enjoy IML and Other Sex-positive Events
Photo by Cesar Torres, all rights reserved.
International Mister Leather is an event that has brought together kinky LGBTQ+ people together for more than 40 years. It’s a meeting space that promotes individual expression through the legacy of leather, rubber, and also newer fetish communities, such as pups. IML is also the current home of POW! The Superhero Fetish meetup, which I host, and which draws hundreds of LGBTQ people who love superhero fetish. It’s one of the largest sex-positive events of its kind, and although it can be a lot of fun, it can also overwhelm you if you’re not careful.
Recently, one of my fans (BrinLondo74 on YouTube) told me that he feels anxious about attending IML for the first time. And he asked me for my advice. I am going to answer Brin’s four questions today so that you can make your own IML experience the most enjoyable, especially if you have never experienced it before.
Please keep in mind that these tips are only informational and are not strict advice. I do have more than 15 years of experience attending events like IML, and you can take these tips and apply them to many other kink or sex-positive events around the world. If you would like to add to this conversation, leave a comment! And if you would like to ask more specific questions, you can ask me on Discord when you join my Patreon community. Patreon subscribers get access to more focused chats when they join.
So, if you have never attended a mega-sized leather or kink event, here are the top 4 tips to make sure you enjoy it in the best way possible.
How should I prepare in advance for my first IML?
The most important way to prep is to get your mindset right. IML draws thousands of people, most of them male-presenting, into a single space, and the sights, smells and sounds are going to make you feel like a kid in a candy shop. Your mindset is number one. Remember that you are on a vacation, and you want to have fun over that weekend. Friendship and social connections are just as important as finding romantic or sex partners, so put yourself in a chill state of mind that’s open to engaging sociallly. Even though everyone looks intimidatingly good in their gear, many people are trying just as hard as you are to make a connection–to find a friend, to buddy up with a sex partner, or even to find a life-long partner. So just relax, get ready to shake hands, and be open to the experience without to many expectations. I spend just as much time as you do with my head buried inside gay apps, but if you can, try to put the smartphone away and strike up conversations in person, whenever possible. And if you love your app, no worries, you can also chat away and arrange to meet in real time. There’s no strict rules on how to do this. Just be aware that people are likelier to flake on an app than when you actually are talking to them in person.
Next, make sure you take care of your health. Be sure you educate yourself on safe sex practices, and if you use medicines like PREP, make sure you don’t forget them, as well as condoms, etc. There’s plenty of free condoms and lube samples on site at IML, but if you have a preferred brand, it’s better to have it with you and avoid issues when you are ready to play with your partner(s). In recent years, IML attendees have begun to challenge gender norms, and I couldn’t be happier about it. You will meet many amazing trans, gender-non-conforming and queer individuals who are there to have as much fun as you are. Be prepared to ask people what their preferred pronouns are, and keep in mind that not everyone at the event will be (nor should be) a carbon copy of what you look like, or what your values are.
Although you will think it’s strange for me to say this because I have so much gear, try not to focus so much on how you look but rather on how you connect with people via eye contact, handshakes and other forms on interpersonal communication.
Upon your arrival in Chicago, make sure you know exactly how to get to your hotel or AirBnb. If you’re staying at the host hotel, get ready to spend some time in line or waiting for elevators, which get quite packed. Give yourself plenty of time to chill in your room once you arrive, and make sure you don’t rush. You have all weekend to enjoy! Taking an extra 30 minutes in your room to relax by taking a second shower, unpacking or even having a light snack with friends is going to ensure you don’t wear yourself out. Once you’re settled in, I recommend walking around the Leather Mart, which is the big expo full of vendors at the host hotel. It’s basically the biggest meeting space, and it gives you a chance to check out who’s there, and to browse many products and basically get your bearings. If you’re looking for places to eat, this handy guide on nearby inexpensive restaurants will help you out. You can find much more upscape spots in the loop and West Loop, but for the sake of keeping it simple, a quick bite is probably what you need in most cases, since you’ll probably be spending a lot of time at the hotel. There’s also a Target nearby at 1 S. State Street.
I'm already in an overstimulated headspace. I'm worried that I may get in over my head, overdo it on the first day. How should I pace myself?
If it makes you feel any better, even veteran attendees at IML often feel like they overdo it throughout the whole weekend. The sensory stimulation is non-stop, and your own emotional and sexual expectations about this type of event are going to super charge your psyche. That can be both good or bad. You will feel euphoric, and maybe a little anxious, too. But instead of cracking your knuckles, make it work to your advantage. The best way to avoid burnout and pace yourself is to do less. What does this mean? Well simply put, don’t be a silly American and overschedule yourself. It’s one of our most vulnerable traits, and we have a lot to learn from visitors who come in from other parts of the world. Aim to basically just do one or two things a day. I mean that. If you aim for one or two, you will have a better time, and it will give you time and space to have adventures in between. For example, on Friday, you could aim to attend the Leather Market to do some shopping around 2 pm (after lunch) and attend the Rubber Cocktail Social by MIR and CRM at 10:30 pm. Does that sound like too little? Not at all. In between that time, you will have lunch, dinner, maybe hit the gym or go for a run in Millennium Park, have drinks or enjoy a play date or two. By focusing on doing less, you’ll actually be doing more. You’ll keep your blood pressure low, and again, allow yourself to focus on meeting quality people, rather than obsess about tasks. Save the tasks for your day job.
How much gear should I bring?
This, my friend is the toughest question of them all! Here’s my advice for two types of travelers: people who travel with just a single carry-on, and people who check luggage. If you are a carry-on traveler, bring only your most essential 2-3 fetish outfits. And bring one outfit of regular civilian clothes. And never forget your swimsuit. That’s it. Leave room in your bag for stuff you will buy at the Leather Market, and as far as toys go, just bring things that travel light. Don’t forget to avoid liquids and other banned objects on flights.
If you are checking luggage, I recommen evenly distributing your fetish gear and your toys across your carry-on and your checked luggage. This way, in the unfrotunate case that your airline loses your luggage, you still have a carry-on with toys and gears to save your kinky ass. As far as toys go, only bring the ones that you know you will truly use. If you have play dates scheduled in advance, this is going to make packing toys way easier. If you are playing it by ear, just bring the stuff you use the most back at home that travels light and well. Keep in mind that more seasoned players bring lots of gear with them in their luggage, so this advice is not for them. Keep things light. You will probably buy new toys and gear at the Leather Market, and you will be glad you made room in your checked bags to accommodate your loot to bring back home.
Most important of all, how do I find you at such a large event?
First and foremost, the easiest way to reach me, Pablo Greene, is to slide into my DMs on Instagram. I use Instagram the most, and I am not a fan of Facebook at all. So if you want to find me, just follow me at @howtokillasuperhero and send a DM. My schedule is quite full, so if I can’t meet up with you, I can at least answer questions and provide you with help. If you see me casually walking around at the event, please say hello. I love meeting readers and fans and taking selfies.
Also, you will find me at POW! On Sunday, May 26. Be sure to pack your cosplay or superhero gear!
IML is an event that is always growing and evolving. Nowadays, it feels incredibly large, and it shares some similarities with the exciting but overwhelming nature of cons like Comic Con. Don’t be afraid of it. Pace yourself, be prepared to make new friends, and don’t create rigid expectations. Once you do so, you’ll enjoy your time there. Now gear up and get ready!
Spandex, Tights and Cosplay: Superhero-Fetish Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Ever since I began to write and publish my book series How to Kill a Superhero, many people of all walks of life have come to me with their stories. In many cases, those superhero fetish lovers thank me for taking the fetish seriously enough to create a book series, and they are grateful that community is building up, thanks to the Superhero Fetish Meetups I organize. At the same time, I get so many questions from people are curious but don’t know what it’s all about. I love answering these questions. After answering literally hundreds of emails, Tumblr messages and other social media DMs about the fetish that I thought I would put together an FAQ that can evolve organically over time to initiate people into this world of spandex, tights, boots and archetypes of strength and power exchange. I do take it seriously, even when I am being tongue in cheek. Let’s open up the doors of superhero fetish. All are welcome. -- Author Pablo Greene
The Essentials of Superhero Fetish
So what is superhero fetish?
Superhero fetish is the sexual and erotic attraction to characters and archetypes derived from superheroes in comic books. The fetish also extends to superheroes seen in TV, film, animated cartoons and even video games. People with this fetish may be aroused by the characters, their costumes, their physiques (which have classically been drawn as incredibly athletic and erotic since the early days of comics). Some superhero fetishists also enjoy the power-exchange dynamics of superheroes. In many storylines, superheroes are captured and bound by villains in their battle against crime and wrongdoers, and many people into the fetish have extended their attraction to superheroes and villains into the realm of BDSM and kink. The generalizations above are only generalizations; superhero fetish is very individual to each person, but some patterns do emerge, and those are highlighted in this FAQ.
I didn’t know that people want to dress up as superheroes in an erotic way. Why do they do it?
The reasons people want to dress up in the superhero costumes or “cosplay” are also very individual. For the average person, cosplaying is a very fun activity that they can do at Halloween, cons (like NY Comic Con), or even 5ks and marathons. But for those who have a superhero fetish, the costumes themselves provide a level of erotic stimulation that is very similar to people who fetishize high heels, cop uniforms, women’s lingerie, leathermen uniforms, or business suits. In the case of superhero fetish, the costumes that original artists in the early 20th century drew were inspired often by the tight wool costumes worn by circus strongmen and other athletes. These body hugging articles of clothing showed off all the musculature and erotic appeal of genital areas using bright colors and iconic accessories such as boots, bracelets, capes and belts. As the 20th and 21st century media (especially film and TV) gave us real actors playing the roles of superheroes and villains, costume designers experimented with many new materials that mimicked the costumes from the comics. In those decades, we have seen superhero costume designs explore nylon, spandex and lycra, satin, leather, latex, PVC and even armor and CGI skin (especially in the past twenty years with the rise of more realistic superhero film adaptations). For those who have this fetish, there can be pleasure in dressing up in this gear, but also immense pleasure in seeing other people wear the gear in the flesh. In a sense, wearing superhero gear in a sexual situation is no different than wearing a sexy pair of underwear or lingerie. It enhances the senses, and it also gives a strong suggestion of the nudity underneath. Of course, many superhero costumes are full bodied, and many fetishists enjoy the feeling of full coverage in materials like lycra, rubber, leather. Good examples of these looks can be seen in iconic heroes like Batman, Superman and Spiderman’s classic costumes.
Isn’t it sort of childish to want to play dress up and do roleplay as heroes and villains?
As many sex researchers and writers have noted, foreplay and a lot of aspects of sex depend on mental stimulation in order to arouse the sexual experience. Each person’s fetishes and kinks are individual, and being accepting of other people’s wants and needs can foster a world where people flourish sexually. Therefore, anyone can say that dressing up as Batman and the Riddler is childish, but I would strongly disagree here. The stories that writers and artists crafted in the comic book form in the course of more than a century tap into some of the most vital passions of the human race: power, strength, moral dilemmas, betrayals and also transformation and rebirth. Therefore, to roleplay as a superhero can only help human beings go deeper into these passions, and I believe that it can also help us learn more about ourselves.
A lot of the images of superhero fetish I see on sites like Tumblr involve superheroes in bondage being tortured. Do all superhero fetish people like getting tied up?
This is a misconception about superhero fetish that is worth taking apart. For many people the fetish is just about the characters and their incredibly tight costumes (and often their superpowers too). In fact, many superhero fetishists I have met over the years on the Internet and in person only fetishize those aspects. Their ideal scene is one in which people dress up in the costumes and enjoy touching each other, and maybe end up in a sexual situation. However, there is an additional subset of superhero fetishists who are strongly engaged in the power exchange of the superhero stories. In other words, they get a hardon or they get wet when they see a superhero captured, bound and gagged, and humiliated by a villain. Many fetishists also get turned on by superheroes being hypnotized or being forced to transform. These scenarios tap into aspects of BDSM and power exchange. We get aroused by these fantasies. In the real world, many superhero fetishists set up scenes where mutual consent is set and limits are negotiated, and as a result, they can tie up, gag, gut punch and crush a superhero (or villain), fully engaging with the fetish in a sadomasochistic way. But this is very individual, and it’s better not to make assumptions about people who identify as superhero fetishists. When in doubt, simply ask how their fetish manifests for them individually.
When did this fetish start?
The fetish as a cultural phenomenon could be said to start in the 20th century with the rise of comic books. It’s in this century when the superhero and supervillain figures rise and become a dominant aspect of global culture. Though LGBT and sexual community visibility was so low it was virtually invisible, it’s fair to assume many people in the 20th century developed the fetish for themselves and may have had encounters and fantasies triggered by the pages of the comic books. It’s also likely that many of the writers and artists themselves had a fetish for the very archetypes they were writing about, making the bulges and muscles, as well as the scenes of power exchange in the stories, a potent brew for themselves, but also for their readers. But as the 60s brought on a sexual revolution, all sorts of marginalized communities began to find a political voice and clear public identity. In my estimation, the internet triggered many superhero fetishists to come out of that fetish closet. For the first time, people with the same erotic urges for superheroes could find each other, share images that aroused them, and even meet in person to live out those fantasies.
However, as a novelist and fiction writer, I believe that it’s mythology that gave us our first superhero fetish. In particular, Greek mythology is probably responsible for our erotic attraction to gods and demigods whose perfectly sculpted bodies played out stories of betrayal, war, rage, and very importantly, many kinds of sex. Other mythologies, including Norse, Celtic, Maya, Aztec, and other mythologies around the world also are responsible for positing the idea of superbeings (aka Gods) who have sexually interesting and arousing phsyiques and powers, and who fall prey to their own lusts, jealousies, joys and fears. Just like heroes in the pantheons of Marvel and DC fall prey to their lusts, jealousies, joys and fears today.
Getting Started with Superhero Fetish
To get started, I recommend using the Internet to find others with this fetish. Some sites that tend to be open to superhero fetish are Recon, Spandex Party, Scruff, Fetlife. If you’re interested in trying on some superhero gear, I also curate a list of Superhero-Friendly Cosplay Vendors. You can also ask me on Twitter at @pablogreene or snapchat at killsuperhero.
Superhero Fetish Community and Resources
What is the Superhero Fetish Meetup?
I organize the Superhero Fetish Meetup at various events, including NY Comic Con, Mid-Atlantic Leather and International Mr. Leather. It’s a way for me to bring superhero fetishists together in a safe space and for people to meet each other. When people come to the meetups, they show up in full cosplay, and they are fun as all hell. There are two ways to get details on upcoming meetups: you can join my newsletter or you can also join the Superhero Fetish Meetup Facebook group I created for this. My meetups skew more toward the BDSM and kink side of superhero fetish, but we welcome everyone. All body types and genders are welcome, and you don’t have to wear fancy cosplay either. I like for these to be as open as possible.
Got more questions for the superhero fetish FAQ? Send us your questions at au@howtokillasuperhero.net and we’ll post the answer here.