Pablo Greene's Readers Share their Definition of Superhero Fetish
Earlier, this month I shared with you my definition of superhero fetish. I also asked fans, readers and subscribers of my Muscle & Spandex newsletter, to share their own definitions of superhero fetish. Today I am proud to publish three of the best ones we received. Enjoy. — Pablo Greene
Adonisnick
For those of us who are into bondage, Superhero Fetish is essentially the modern version of [the game] cowboys and indians.
The ideal superhero fetish [scene] should encompass the gamut that includes the capture and torments of the heroes, culminating with the ultimate fate of the arch-villain and his/her henchmen getting captured. Tops can be either the villain or the hero. Bottoms can also be either. Superhero fetish should encompass a complete story arc, that means both the a cliffhanger and a climax as necessary to the ultimate experience.
Spandexandy
I will turn 50 this year, so my influence was TV and comic books, which were expensive imports from the USA. I occasionally got a hold of these from my cousins in Minnesota. So the first time I noticed [ther erotic aspect of superheroes] would have been the Adam West and Burt Ward in the Batman TV series. At the time I was about 10 years old. What caught me eye in childhood is something not sure about, but as I got older, it was the costumes that Batman, Robin, the Riddler and other villains wore. As I entered my 20’s, the scenarios of superheroes being caught and tied up certainly got my attention.
The arrival Tim Burton's Batman film in 1989 revived my interest in the genre. Yes the films in the series got silly later on, but the costumes kept me interested, as I discovered rubber/latex/neoprene. I was drawn to the costumes/fabrics as fetish, and yes the materials, feel of it against the skin and how it looks and moves over the skin had, and still have a huge appeal for me. As I grew older and less afraid I did more exploring, I discovered BDSM and erotic books, and as a result I became more aware of the power play, dominance, control aspects of the stories. However the arrival of a Kindle was an opening of my mind. I discovered Pablo Green’s four How to Kill a Superhero novels. As I read and enjoyed them, more books and authors came into view. I discovered a world of people who had similar likes. Yes, this sounds slow compared to lot of young people but I was on dial up internet until my 20's and broadband only be came an option in late 20's.
Superhero fetish for me combines fetish of costume, materials, masks, hidden identities, being able to stand up and do things you would never be able to do as you. There is the power play the victim who eventually gets the upper hand and reverses the roles. I don't like to use the term good versus bad, but when right eventually wins, it gives us hope. The darker bondage/pain fantasies from novels go to levels beyond anything i have experienced or want to experience. To me, there is a difference between fantasy and reality. Superhero Fetish is something I enjoy. It is both escapist and fantastical, but also erotic and forbidden. It can be dark but rewarding.
Superhero fetish is part of me and always has been. My life would be much worse off without it.
Johnny Gayzmonic
Superhero fetish for me is about exploring both the trappings and tropes of what makes and breaks a superhero. It's not just the skin-tight spandex or the muscles. It's not just the headstrong confidence or love of danger. Although most of that is enough. It's about how to bring the hero down. How to show he's vulnerable and human. I often joke that I know I'm kinky because I only like Superman when he's in peril. There's a thrill to seeing the most extraordinary individuals brought down a level, to have power over the most powerful. But it's in that vulnerability that we also find power, because to admit you have a weakness is itself a form of strength. We want to be the hero, but we do that by dominating the hero and exploiting his weakness. Because if a superhero is as vulnerable as the rest of us, that means we can all be superheroes.
Kinky and Queer? Discord's Providing More Soul than Gay Dating Apps
By Blog Contributor Johnny Gayzmonic
It ain’t easy being kinky. It’s fun, but it ain’t easy. Being kinky isn’t just having a fetish or occasionally “spicing things up in the bedroom.” For me and many others, kink is a philosophy, not an activity. It’s a state of being and a state of mind, a part of sexual identity as much as something like being gay or bisexual is. It’s an indelible and irrevocable part of the core of who we are. It’s very nature insists that it goes beyond the bedroom.
If you’re kinky, it can be difficult for people to find connections. It can be hard to find that rapport that comes from a very specific set of shared interests. This is especially difficult if your kinks are intersectional, like mine are. It’s one thing to be into muscles or spandex or superheroes, but combine all three with a touch of BDSM and a presentation that’s unabashedly queer, and it becomes much more difficult to find like-minded invididuals.
While social media can be great for discovering likeminded folks, too often it can devolve into a kind of virtual circle jerk. That can be as literal or metaphorical as you like. If kink is who you are and not what you do, you need more than just whack-off material in your community. You need to be able to identify and sympathize with other kinky people. Likewise, dating apps like Scruff and Grindr tend to have a very narrow definition of what kink is, and it’s treated more like a hobby or occasional indulgence. Even apps specifically catered to the kink community like Recon focus much more on hook-ups and indulging the kinks than living and breathing it.
For me, things came together through Discord, specifically the Discord server of one Pablo Greene. I knew Pablo through his altar ego Cesar Torres: author of queer superhero fiction and creator of LED Queens, the company behind the workout tights that are essential workout gear for me. I was intrigued by Pablo’s cosplay photos, where he presented himself not only as heroes from Cesar Torres’ works but as heroic characters I knew and loved like Spider-Man, Shazam, and Jean Grey.
To help support Pablo, I donated to his Patreon, which netted me an invite to his Discord server. And what an invite that was. I was not sure what to fully expect, having had limited experience with Discord, but what I found was a forum and community of people who had interests in sync with my own. Queer superhero fans, cosplayers, fitness geeks, and spandex enthusiasts as far as the eye could see.
But it was the daily goings-on at Discord that truly made me feel at home. It wasn’t just trading hot pics -- although there is some of that going on -- but a full discussion on what these kinks mean to us and how we experience them in daily life. There’s discussion on how to source cosplay materials. There’s talk about what we think about superheroes in film and television and comic books. There’s posting of motivational fitness and cosplay pictures, which often lead to surprisingly constructive and supportive comments.
Best of all, the server isn’t primarily designed to hook up users like a dating app. First and foremost, it’s a place of discussion, support, and collaboration for those of us who in some cases might not have any other outlets for expressing our love of these topics or talking about the kinks that make us who we are. That being said, Pablo has provided one NSFW channel to allow people to indulge the more sexual side of these kinks. Because in the end, it’s impossible to remove that part of the equation.
Best of all, it’s a place where those of us who love the intersection of superheroes, fitness, cosplay, and kink can thrive and be honest with who we are and what we want. To quote fellow Discord user Peakeatchu (IG/Twitter: peakeatchu): “It’s where I can feel most myself. I came out in my mid twenties and being from a small town, was very shy and insecure about myself. Six years ago I started cosplaying and found friends with the same interest, and didn’t feel judged by them. I started gaining confidence in myself, and expanded my collection of costumes. Then one day, I say one of Pablo Greene’s posts about superheroes. We started talking and over the last few years become friends. With the advent of his Patreon page, I feel that I’ve had a great opportunity to learn more about the superhero kink and now with Discord, there is a larger group that I’m part of where I get to share my opinions and thoughts about our common shared interests.
I have a theory. I’m a fan of the Mad Max franchise, and if you’ve seen any of those films, you’ll notice how most of the people dress in some kind of fetish wear. Think of how the gang in The Road Warrior is decked out in harnesses, athletic pads, and leather. You can see similar concepts in the countless post-apocalyptic Mad Max knock-offs from the 80s, as well as in films like The Warriors. My theory is that in these kinds of future worlds, the reason the gangs dress like this is because they were all kinksters before the apocalypse, and they were either a tight-knit community already or quickly came together afterward. Either way, they found strength and purpose through their shared kink identity, and that’s why allowed them to survive.
So it’s time to start connecting with your fellow kinksters and to reclaim your own bit of personal power. Find your strength, find your voice, and find your community. The kink in me recognizes and respects the kink in you. And it’s beautiful.
About the Author
Johnny Gayzmonic is a writer, musician, film critic, and self-professed spandex enthusiast who lives, works, and lifts weights in Minneapolis, MN. Find him on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram @johnnygayzmonic.
Want to join Pablo’s Discord Sever?
I Will Not Be Continuing My Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020
Dear Queeroes,
I am writing today to let you know that I will not be producing and hosting my party POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020, and I want to tell you why I made this decision. IML has been a wonderful space for me as a kinky person, and also as a book author and artist. I first had an author table at IML at the Marriott in 2013 thanks to the wonderful support of the Leather Archives and Museum. Year by year, I came back to IML with new volumes of my series to sell and autograph. In 2014, I kicked off POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML and MAL as a grassroots event to build community. At the time, I wanted to bring together gay, queer, trans and gender-non-conforming male identified folks to celebrate their passion for remixing classic leather, kink, and superhero fetish. And guess what? The party grew, and grew. As of last year, the party draws about 200 attendees in fantastic kinky cosplays that make it the world’s largest superhero fetish event, by my estimate.
Starting in 2016, The Superhero Fetish Meetup was added to the IML lineup and official schedule, which blew my mind, and also help extend the reach of the event. As you can see by photos on my Instagram, you can see how each year the party grew in attendance and fun.
Fall 2019 has just begun, and I have decided to not continue POW! The Superhero Fetish Meetup. It’s of course not easy to make this decision, but it comes from very positive reasons.
Superhero Fetish Meetup at IML 2020
My brand of kinky and queer superhero books is expanding, and I never expected to have such a popular book series that delights gay and queer men. In fact, I am releasing a fifth How to Kill a Superhero book in 2020. As an author, I am grateful my readers have come this far in the journey.
As my book series has gained more reach around the world, the scope of the community building that’s part of the superhero and spandex fetish community has also inspired me to go into new directions with the events I curate. Nowadays, my book readers and community members include more trans, queer and non-binary folks, women and people of color than ever before, and it’s thanks to their feedback that I am moving into new virtual and physical spaces that celebrate who they are. That means that I will be organizing new events and meetups in the near future that align with the needs of my readers and fans. This includes more international events in Mexico, the UK, the European Union and Asia, as well as an expansion of my online communities, such as the one in my Discord community (which you can join when you subscribe to my free newsletter). It also will include more inclusive and safer spaces that align to the needs of my community.
I want to stress that the IML organizers have always been professional, generous, organized, and great friends. I am in awe of how much they accomplish year by year, and their legacy can never be forgotten. I will always enjoy visiting IML as a spectator and supporter of its efforts in the LGBTQ community and worldwide kink populations. I send out a huge blast of gratitude and joy to them as I move into a new chapter of this story.
This Month In Spandex: July Edition
This is a preview of the new photo set Tonatiuh, God of the Sun, coming later this month to my Patreon. Credit: Cesar Torres, all rights reserved.
The month of July contains many surprises for my amazing readers, fans and Patreon subscribers! This is what you can expect to drop:
Stickers are Shipping
New subscribers who joined my Patreon or upgraded tiers in June will get their exclusive 4”x4” laptop sticker. Stickers begin to ship this week.
New Photo Sets Drop This Month
For my first photo shoot this month, I am doing a new and intense bondage shoot! But there’s a twist! This time, Patreon subscribers get to choose what superhero or villain gets tied or does the tying. All subscribers will be encouraged to post their suggestions of what the cosplay and bondage shoot should be! And the subscribers in the Mega Photo tier will be the judges of all the suggestions. That photo set will drop July 26 at my Patreon, and it will be available to all the tiers. The Mega Photo tiers and above will get 2-3 bonus shots, as well.
Check out the brand new teaser I posted above! I will be releasing a new photo set called Tonatiuh, God of the Sun. In this set, I will guide you into my world of Aztec mythology and introduce you to the sun god Tonatiuh as I mash him up with the gay superhero Apollo from DC Comics! This new photo set extends the ideas that I developed in the How to Kill a Superhero books. I think you will love them. This photo set drops July 31 on my Patreon.
My Short Film
I’ll be posting excerpts from the script of the short film I am working on! Look for that to drop on July 12
New YouTube Episodes
This month on my YouTube I’ll be focusing on livestreams. This gives me some space and time to focus on the writing of my film script, but it lets me stay in touch with you and all the queeroes. Here are the times and dates for streams this month:
July 9 at 5 PM Central. Topic: The DC gay superhero Apollo and the making of the Tonatiuh Photo Set
July 16, at 5 PM Central: Fan Q&A
July 23 at 5 pm Central Topic TBD
July 30 at 5 pm Central Topic TBD
4 Essential Tips To Enjoy IML and Other Sex-positive Events
Photo by Cesar Torres, all rights reserved.
International Mister Leather is an event that has brought together kinky LGBTQ+ people together for more than 40 years. It’s a meeting space that promotes individual expression through the legacy of leather, rubber, and also newer fetish communities, such as pups. IML is also the current home of POW! The Superhero Fetish meetup, which I host, and which draws hundreds of LGBTQ people who love superhero fetish. It’s one of the largest sex-positive events of its kind, and although it can be a lot of fun, it can also overwhelm you if you’re not careful.
Recently, one of my fans (BrinLondo74 on YouTube) told me that he feels anxious about attending IML for the first time. And he asked me for my advice. I am going to answer Brin’s four questions today so that you can make your own IML experience the most enjoyable, especially if you have never experienced it before.
Please keep in mind that these tips are only informational and are not strict advice. I do have more than 15 years of experience attending events like IML, and you can take these tips and apply them to many other kink or sex-positive events around the world. If you would like to add to this conversation, leave a comment! And if you would like to ask more specific questions, you can ask me on Discord when you join my Patreon community. Patreon subscribers get access to more focused chats when they join.
So, if you have never attended a mega-sized leather or kink event, here are the top 4 tips to make sure you enjoy it in the best way possible.
How should I prepare in advance for my first IML?
The most important way to prep is to get your mindset right. IML draws thousands of people, most of them male-presenting, into a single space, and the sights, smells and sounds are going to make you feel like a kid in a candy shop. Your mindset is number one. Remember that you are on a vacation, and you want to have fun over that weekend. Friendship and social connections are just as important as finding romantic or sex partners, so put yourself in a chill state of mind that’s open to engaging sociallly. Even though everyone looks intimidatingly good in their gear, many people are trying just as hard as you are to make a connection–to find a friend, to buddy up with a sex partner, or even to find a life-long partner. So just relax, get ready to shake hands, and be open to the experience without to many expectations. I spend just as much time as you do with my head buried inside gay apps, but if you can, try to put the smartphone away and strike up conversations in person, whenever possible. And if you love your app, no worries, you can also chat away and arrange to meet in real time. There’s no strict rules on how to do this. Just be aware that people are likelier to flake on an app than when you actually are talking to them in person.
Next, make sure you take care of your health. Be sure you educate yourself on safe sex practices, and if you use medicines like PREP, make sure you don’t forget them, as well as condoms, etc. There’s plenty of free condoms and lube samples on site at IML, but if you have a preferred brand, it’s better to have it with you and avoid issues when you are ready to play with your partner(s). In recent years, IML attendees have begun to challenge gender norms, and I couldn’t be happier about it. You will meet many amazing trans, gender-non-conforming and queer individuals who are there to have as much fun as you are. Be prepared to ask people what their preferred pronouns are, and keep in mind that not everyone at the event will be (nor should be) a carbon copy of what you look like, or what your values are.
Although you will think it’s strange for me to say this because I have so much gear, try not to focus so much on how you look but rather on how you connect with people via eye contact, handshakes and other forms on interpersonal communication.
Upon your arrival in Chicago, make sure you know exactly how to get to your hotel or AirBnb. If you’re staying at the host hotel, get ready to spend some time in line or waiting for elevators, which get quite packed. Give yourself plenty of time to chill in your room once you arrive, and make sure you don’t rush. You have all weekend to enjoy! Taking an extra 30 minutes in your room to relax by taking a second shower, unpacking or even having a light snack with friends is going to ensure you don’t wear yourself out. Once you’re settled in, I recommend walking around the Leather Mart, which is the big expo full of vendors at the host hotel. It’s basically the biggest meeting space, and it gives you a chance to check out who’s there, and to browse many products and basically get your bearings. If you’re looking for places to eat, this handy guide on nearby inexpensive restaurants will help you out. You can find much more upscape spots in the loop and West Loop, but for the sake of keeping it simple, a quick bite is probably what you need in most cases, since you’ll probably be spending a lot of time at the hotel. There’s also a Target nearby at 1 S. State Street.
I'm already in an overstimulated headspace. I'm worried that I may get in over my head, overdo it on the first day. How should I pace myself?
If it makes you feel any better, even veteran attendees at IML often feel like they overdo it throughout the whole weekend. The sensory stimulation is non-stop, and your own emotional and sexual expectations about this type of event are going to super charge your psyche. That can be both good or bad. You will feel euphoric, and maybe a little anxious, too. But instead of cracking your knuckles, make it work to your advantage. The best way to avoid burnout and pace yourself is to do less. What does this mean? Well simply put, don’t be a silly American and overschedule yourself. It’s one of our most vulnerable traits, and we have a lot to learn from visitors who come in from other parts of the world. Aim to basically just do one or two things a day. I mean that. If you aim for one or two, you will have a better time, and it will give you time and space to have adventures in between. For example, on Friday, you could aim to attend the Leather Market to do some shopping around 2 pm (after lunch) and attend the Rubber Cocktail Social by MIR and CRM at 10:30 pm. Does that sound like too little? Not at all. In between that time, you will have lunch, dinner, maybe hit the gym or go for a run in Millennium Park, have drinks or enjoy a play date or two. By focusing on doing less, you’ll actually be doing more. You’ll keep your blood pressure low, and again, allow yourself to focus on meeting quality people, rather than obsess about tasks. Save the tasks for your day job.
How much gear should I bring?
This, my friend is the toughest question of them all! Here’s my advice for two types of travelers: people who travel with just a single carry-on, and people who check luggage. If you are a carry-on traveler, bring only your most essential 2-3 fetish outfits. And bring one outfit of regular civilian clothes. And never forget your swimsuit. That’s it. Leave room in your bag for stuff you will buy at the Leather Market, and as far as toys go, just bring things that travel light. Don’t forget to avoid liquids and other banned objects on flights.
If you are checking luggage, I recommen evenly distributing your fetish gear and your toys across your carry-on and your checked luggage. This way, in the unfrotunate case that your airline loses your luggage, you still have a carry-on with toys and gears to save your kinky ass. As far as toys go, only bring the ones that you know you will truly use. If you have play dates scheduled in advance, this is going to make packing toys way easier. If you are playing it by ear, just bring the stuff you use the most back at home that travels light and well. Keep in mind that more seasoned players bring lots of gear with them in their luggage, so this advice is not for them. Keep things light. You will probably buy new toys and gear at the Leather Market, and you will be glad you made room in your checked bags to accommodate your loot to bring back home.
Most important of all, how do I find you at such a large event?
First and foremost, the easiest way to reach me, Pablo Greene, is to slide into my DMs on Instagram. I use Instagram the most, and I am not a fan of Facebook at all. So if you want to find me, just follow me at @howtokillasuperhero and send a DM. My schedule is quite full, so if I can’t meet up with you, I can at least answer questions and provide you with help. If you see me casually walking around at the event, please say hello. I love meeting readers and fans and taking selfies.
Also, you will find me at POW! On Sunday, May 26. Be sure to pack your cosplay or superhero gear!
IML is an event that is always growing and evolving. Nowadays, it feels incredibly large, and it shares some similarities with the exciting but overwhelming nature of cons like Comic Con. Don’t be afraid of it. Pace yourself, be prepared to make new friends, and don’t create rigid expectations. Once you do so, you’ll enjoy your time there. Now gear up and get ready!